It seems like you go along in your everyday life working, sleeping, and playing a little when there’s time and energy. Then something happens that changes everything.
On Feb. 16 I became a grandma.
I’ve known for the past seven months that this day would come and I was attempting to prepare for it. But there was nothing that could prepare me for the joy in watching my little girl become a woman in a single moment of time.
One minute my only child was in excruciating pain and the next minute she was holding a new life in her hands — the pain forgotten, the past nine months of physical torture a mere memory as she looked upon her only son with that special bond of motherhood.
When Logan David pushed his way into the world with eyes wide open and arms outstretched, it was like the atmosphere expanded to make room for a new life — one filled with dreams, hopes, loves, disappointments, sorrows, everything that comes with being human.
Everything changed in that moment of time.
The love I felt for my new grandson was something I expected, but the joy I found seeing my daughter as a new mom was a revelation to me.
Not only do I revel in every coo that comes from my new grandbaby, but I also marvel at my daughter as she holds him tight to feed him. I am so thankful that I have been able to be a part of this transition in my daughter’s life and beginning of my grandson’s.
My colleague Jeff Benziger, editor of the Ceres Courier, also became a grandparent for the first time this month. It seems my wonder at the birth of a grandchild is common.
“I suddenly remembered how I loved the smell of baby lotion, and the peacefulness of kissing and holding a sleeping baby,” Jeff wrote about the birth of his grandson, Connor.
The question remains now, what exactly is my role as grandma? Unconditional love? Absolutely. A comforting and supporting presence throughout his life? Guaranteed.
It’s the other stuff that’s hard. When do I give advice about sleeping schedules and what to feed him? Do I have to ask permission before buying him his first bike?
Jeff shares in my confusion at this new role in life.
“For me, being a dad was an unparalleled experience. There's something very personal and special about being charged with doing your best to bond with, feed, care for and raise children from your own generic material into happy and healthy adults. I delighted in showing them the world. I have a freight train of sweet memories — the baths, wrestling on the floor, playing monster truck on the bed, watching the school performances and the games, the road trips, meals around the table, the stern talks and the stroking of the hair in quiet times — that are eternally precious.
“I know some of those things won't happen with my grandchild. I am, after all, not the parent. I have to share this little guy with a lot more people than I did as a dad. For sure, though, I expect to be a part of the good and bad of his life. There will be camping trips, weekend outings, adventures, times to impart wisdom and truth,” Jeff wrote.
Sharing is a hard lesson to learn in kindergarten — and even harder as an adult. I expect that the next few months and years will be filled with precious moments and hard lessons learned.
But in the meantime, I will enjoy every minute of being a new grandma!