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‘Grumpy Grams’ deliver Christmas jeer
Grumpy Grams
Turlock's Ranch of Horrors is once again offering "Grumpy Grams" this Christmas, hand-delivered by a very familiar — and green — character (Photo contributed).

Name of business: Grumpy Grams by Turlock’s Ranch of Horror

Type of business: Hand-delivered messages and gifts

Location: Turlock

Hours: Grams can be booked for Dec. 10 through 12 and Dec. 17 through 19

Contact information: Call or text 209-947-8999 or message Ranch of Horror on Facebook to book

Specialty: Christmas entertainment with a twist


History of business:

Christmas in Turlock just got a lot greener. 

Ranch of Horror may be known for hosting a spooky haunted house each Halloween, but the Turlock business is becoming just as popular for its holiday gram services. This Christmas, one particularly grinch-like delivery man is making waves as he visits Turlockers bearing gifts — even though his heart is three times too small.

While many are familiar with Ranch of Horror’s frightening valentine grams hand-delivered by spooky clowns each February, the business also began offering “Grumpy Grams” last year. Delivered by a very familiar, green and furry Christmas character named Grumpy, those who book a gram can expect plenty of tomfoolery along with a “Stinkin’ Stocking” filled with gifts. 

“The clown grams were so successful that we decided to start doing these Christmas grams, too, and the response has been incredible,” said Heather May of Ranch of Horror. “With everything like the pandemic going on, these grams really help us stay afloat.”

Grumpy can make quick appearances at homes or longer appearances for parties, May said, and extra Stinkin’ Stockings can be purchased for larger get-togethers. Groups that have received visits both this year and last are enamored with how closely Grumpy resembles and embodies his Hollywood counterpart, right down to the fuzz on his fingers. 

Many Turlockers likely spotted Grumpy in the downtown Christmas parade last weekend, where he paraded down Main Street with Santa’s sack of toys strapped to his bike. 

“Sometimes kids can be a little bit afraid of the character, but the adults just love it,” May said. 

Stockings are filled with gifts like Christmas socks, modeling clay, ornament craft sets and more, she added, setting them apart from the typical holiday haul. A shorter meet and greet can be purchased for $75 and includes one Stinkin’ Stocking along with a photo op.  Hour-long visits for Christmas parties or other gatherings are $125, and extra stockings can be purchased for $10 each. Gram deliveries are restricted to the Turlock area.

“This is something we really look forward to all year long,” May said.